Giant Zucchini and Opening Prayers

Sunday was not the best day for me.

It began with a fun spree of being woken up about every 30 minutes from 1-4 a.m. Caleb said his tummy hurt every time, but he never did throw up. (I never thought I'd wish my kid to throw up, just to help ease the tummy ache and let me go to sleep for a longer stretch.)

I guess this was a good reminder that we are finished having babies, as we really don't do well on interrupted night's sleep.

Caleb woke up happy and perky, so we proceeded with our normal Sunday morning routine. The two things that were different than usual: 1) We slept in a little longer than normal because of the aforementioned night awakenings. 2) Because Caleb wasn't feeling well Saturday night, he didn't have his bath and got in the tub at 10.

Matt left for a meeting and we were on our own. I finished getting ready, did Aubree's hair, and told the kids to get in the car at 10:45, when I noticed my little Caleb STILL in the bath. Aaaaah!!! It was a mad dash to get him shampooed, rinsed, dried, dressed, hair combed, teeth brushed, etc. We hustled out the door at 11, knowing full-well we would be late for church. (Side note: The prior Sunday, the ward executive secretary asked me to give the opening prayer in Sacrament Meeting. Additional side note: I did not remember this.)

I dropped Aubree and Marcus off at the front door so I could park in the back. Since Matt goes early, he saves our seats and the kids would know right where to go. Caleb didn't have shoes or socks on, so I told him to hurry and get them on. As I watched Marcus and Aubree walk through the door, I noticed a box in front of the church that said, "Please take one." I found that interesting. I thought I saw zucchini in the box, and got a little excited. I didn't plant any zucchini, but just got a new zucchini bread recipe that would be delicious. I decided to do what it said and "take one." I put the car in park. I opened the door and told Caleb to hurry with those socks. Then I walked up to the door and found this...

YES! It was a box full of GIGANTIC ZUCCHINI!!

I picked up that green baby and ran to my car. Caleb still did not have his shoes and socks on, so we parked and I started to help him. Just then Aubree ran out to the car, "Dad said that you have the opening prayer. I'll take over."

"Oh shoot!" I said. I had totally forgotten about the prayer! I ran in my high heels to the front door of the church. Just as I walked in, I saw Bro. V close the door to the chapel. I was just a few seconds too late. Kim and Bryce were in the foyer and I said, "What do I do?? Do I walk in there? Do I just casually walk up to the stand and start praying, as if nothing happened?" They told me they thought I was too late and that someone would cover for me. I stopped and listened. It was silent. I wondered if someone was going to start praying. (The speakers in the foyer were off, so that's why I couldn't hear anyone.) Maybe the whole congregation was just sitting there. Maybe Matt knew I was coming and thought he'd wait. Aaaaah! I peeked through the door and could hear Matt's voice. Phew! He had covered for me.

I walked back out to the van to finish helping Aubree get Caleb's shoes on. (Freak! How long does it take to put shoes on?!?) I took one more look at my giant zucchini in the car...

I wonder if I hadn't stopped to get the doggone zucchini, if I would've gotten in there on time to fulfill my assignment. Well, there's no point in worrying about that now. I'm going to go make some zucchini bread and hope that next time I remember the prayer!!

The 7 Worst Things Parents Do

The other day I was at the orthodontist discussing my kids' orthodontic care. Aubree is excited to get braces on soon as she's a little self-conscious about the gaps in her top teeth. Because my kids are slow to lose baby teeth, we have to wait a little longer than the average Joe. The orthodontist and his assistant were in the room talking to me about getting three of Aubree's baby teeth pulled. I need to remind myself that I shouldn't use sarcasm or try to be funny with people that barely know me. That reminder didn't happen, however.

"Can't I just get a wrench and pull those babies out myself?" I asked them. "I'd rather save myself paying $50 per tooth, just to have the dentist do it."

They both looked a little startled. "Do you numb her when you pull them out?" the assistant asked.

"Oh, do you need to numb her for that? Well then I guess I better go to the dentist," I replied.

Any friend of mine would know I was kidding, but these guys just gave me funny looks. Later on in the day I was back at the orthodontist for Tyler's check-up. I was reading the book, "The 7 Worst Things Parents Do." (John and Linda Friel are the authors. I highly recommend it.) When I saw the assistant from earlier in the day, I almost said, "Hey, this book says that one of the top 7 worst things you can do to your kids is pull their teeth out with a wrench and no numbing stuff." Unfortunately I didn't see her to be able to say that.

I'm sure you are wondering what this book says ARE the 7 worst things parents do, so I will tell you:
1. Baby your child.
2. Put your marriage last.
3. Push your child into too many activities.
4. Ignore your emotional or spiritual life.
5. Be your child's best friend.
6. Fail to give your child structure.
7. Expect your child to fulfill your dreams.

There you have it! I highly recommend this one. It is a short, easy read. I own it and pull it out every few years, just to remind myself of the things I shouldn't do. (In addition to pulling an un-numbed child's tooth out with a wrench.) Let me know if you want to borrow it!

Online Driving School

After the last downer post, I thought I better get another one up here quick.

So I'm not sure if anyone remembers when I got the speeding ticket a few months ago... http://thelittlefigs.blogspot.com/2009/07/aimees-words-of-wisdom-speeding-tickets.html

Anyway, since we had just switched insurance companies and I didn't want to heavily disappoint my new agent with word that his new client got a speeding ticket just days after switching, I opted for the more expensive approach of paying for the ticket and then paying more to go to driving school. (That was one mother-long sentence!)

My driving school options included attending a live class one night, or doing it online. I think it was about $20 more to do it online, but to be able to choose when to do it was appealing. Since I've done my CE classes for my mortgage license online before, I figured it would be a snap. My CE classes included watching a guy give a class about various topics. Every few minutes something would pop up on the screen and you'd have to click it or it would log you out. It was their way of making sure you were really still watching. Also at the end of the section, you had to answer a question.

I actually didn't mind doing my CE because I could multi-task by playing Spider Solitaire at the same time -- something I don't ordinarily have the time to play.

Well, I agreed to online driving school. What I didn't expect is that I have to flippin' read for 2 hours and 15 minutes. Yes, I have to READ the class. And to make it more annoying, they don't put the "continue" button at the bottom of the screen for several minutes so they can make sure you: a) really read it, and b) didn't read it so fast that you didn't retain it.

I am a fairly fast reader, so this has been annoying. To the point that I decided to try to multi-task in between waiting for the "continue" button to show up. Imagine my frustration when I started getting the answers wrong on the quiz, and it would take me back to the previous page to read ALL OVER AGAIN, and still not show the "continue" button for several minutes. Oh, and you don't get to count the time on the do-overs towards your 2 hours and 15 minutes. (Of course talking to Sarah on the phone while trying to read about Utah driving laws probably isn't a very good way to multi-task.)

I am proud to say that I got 1 hour done today. Holy cow. It is going to be so awesome when Matt walks in the door from work and says, "How was your day, honey?" And I can say, "Well, I failed a few of the quizzes on driving, but I did get an hour of driving school done today."

It's Only Money...

I hesitate to write this post. I feel strongly that we can all learn from each other, though, so I want to share some important lessons I have learned over the last little while.

A few years ago we were approached by someone to start doing some hard money lending. Basically what that means is that you lend people money based on a deed of trust or a promissory note. These were all based on real estate deals, so they were tied to the deed on a property -- most of them had us in second lien position on the home. (It's the same thing as a second mortgage with a bank.)

After meeting with a financial guy who tried to teach us to "put our money in motion," we opted to purchase our rental using money from our savings, and invest in some hard money lending using funds from a home equity line on our home. The rental, over the long haul, will be a good investment for us despite the headaches it has brought the past few months. The hard money lending... well, it didn't bode so well.

We started loaning smaller amounts -- $20,000, $50,000, 77,000, here and there. We were making 15% interest, plus some fees on each deal. They seemed to be working out okay. We got paid back on all but one... the mack-daddy loan of $108,500. On this particular deal, one of my family members also wanted to participate, so about $63,000 was our money.

For over a year we received the monthly payments until the real estate market crashed. Then the builder, who had borrowed the money, decided to walk away. He and another man were on the promissory note. The home went into foreclosure and all we had left was a promissory note to sue them on.

We have been going through legal proceedings for over a year now. A week away from our court date we found out both had filed bankruptcy and we are left with nothing.

In digging a little deeper, I'm finding out that we have been the victims of mortgage fraud. Interesting, seeing as I am in the business. The documentation they gave us that helped us make our decision to loan the money (like the appraisal), was all a fraud. We found out that this man had 21 deals like this going. He had offered money to people to let him use their credit. (Thank goodness that wasn't us!) He had so many people at his bankruptcy hearing that they needed to reschedule it so they could have enough room for all the debtors. Some of us are meeting with the Attorney General's office to pursue a mortgage fraud case.

Does it stink to lose $63,000 (plus interest)? Yep. It really stinks. What stinks even more is feeling responsible for the family member who has also lost money. (Even though his decision to invest was his alone.)

I think more than losing the money is the feeling of being vulnerable. It feels terrible to know people have taken advantage of us. It makes me question who I can trust. Matt and I work in financial industries. We did what we have warned people not to do. It makes us feel stupid. I especially feel responsible, as I was the one who found these deals and researched them.

Sometimes I think Heavenly Father lets us trip and fall so we can learn from that skinned knee. I know we have learned valuable lessons that can be passed down to our own children. We have become much more conservative in our investments. We realize that there is no such thing as easy money. We realize that greed can lead us to a poor outcome. We are grateful that we are learning this at a (relatively) young age, when we have time to recover. We are grateful that this loss has hurt, but not devasted our financial well-being. We are grateful that we have our integrity -- we never did anything wrong or dishonest in this deal. I am grateful that our credit wasn't involved and affected. I have been blessed to have been given a lot of mortgage business this year, which helps to take away the sting of losing money for my family. I know Heavenly Father is aware of us. He has us learn lessons in humility to teach us and make us stronger. We have felt that.

I don't write this to garner pity of any kind. I write it because I know there are many people out there who have been burned and can relate with financial difficulties. I think it helps to hear people say, "Yes, I know how you feel." For those of you who have dealt with a financial problem, I know how you feel.

But in the end... it's only money.

Dating Again

Since Matt and I have been dealing with some incredible life stresses lately, we have made a renewed effort to do a better job dating. It gives us something to look forward to after long, and sometimes overwhelming weeks.

We decided that we would take turns being in charge of the date. The first week I was in charge. I started by texting him a message to ask him out for Friday night. I told him I would pick him up at 6, but asked if he wouldn't mind driving. (I knew the date would be much more relaxing for him if he wasn't watching me drive. ha ha!)

He didn't have a clue where we were going or what we would be doing, but was told to dress casual and come hungry.

I went to the front door of our house to "pick him up." I rang the doorbell and Caleb answered. "Hi, is your daddy here?" I asked. He said, "Whaaaaat??? You're my mom!" I told him I was here to pick his dad up for a date. The kids ran and got Matt and off we went. They giggled out the window as they watched us pull away.

I told Matt to drive to 1900 S. Redwood Road -- kind of a run-down industrial area. We went in to this African Restaurant...


You can't see it very well in this picture, but it was a great little place. Matt served his mission in South Africa, and although the food is not exactly like he ate there, it was super fun and good!

When we got there, they asked us if we wanted to eat upstairs. We agreed, and when we went upstairs, we realized that we were the only people there. How cool! We had the restaurant to ourselves! (Or is it scary when a restaurant is practically empty on a Friday night??)

My cousin, Alana, told me she had eaten here and thought the food was great, so we were excited to try it.

We ordered what the waitress recommended, not really knowing what it was. It was delicious! We ate with our hands, just like they said to.

Afterwards, I had planned to take Matt to Ensign Peak. (AKA: Make-out point) I guess we should be proud to say that neither of us could find the place. We stopped and got Dunford chocolate cake donuts (our favorite!), and went to Temple Square instead. We enjoyed sitting on our blankets, eating donuts, in front of the SL Temple on the Main Street Plaza. It was so peaceful!

Last night was Matt's turn for our weekly date. He asked me out, came to the front door to pick me up, much to the delight of our giggling kids. They were so confused! "But you are our Mommy and Daddy," they said. "But we go on dates still," we replied.

Matt took me to one of my favorites -- The Blue Iguana. I love their great mole sauces and that there is always a buy-one-get-one-free coupon floating around. (Our dinner was $4 plus tip because we had a small amount left from a gift card, too.)

Afterward he took me to Murray Park. This is where he proposed to me. He had brought blankets to sit on, his Ipod and speakers, and some cards. We sat on the grass, playing music and we played "Speed." (It was a game we played on our first date.)

We had to run to our rental, after, to sign a new lease with our new renter. Then afterwards we went to Leatherby's and shared a banana split. Yum!

Next week it is my week to plan. Does anyone have any ideas?? (Matt, if you are reading this, don't read the comments.)

The Week of the Rental...

Last week was an interesting week. Over the past few months we have had a renter who decided not to pay rent and also decided to sublease the house to friends who were drug users, without our permission. We found this out when we got a call from one of the neighbors telling us there had been two narcotics raids on the house in the past two months.

It made me sick. Those poor neighbors also sent us a letter, asking for the safety of their neighborhood back. They had been dealing with cars coming and going at all hours, and shady characters living at the premises. We were clueless. (One neighbor found a syringe with a needle the other day in their yard, next door.)

Matt and I had a visit to see what was going on. The yard was trashed. Almost all the doors had been kicked in by the police. (Frustrating that they could kick in all the doors, but as the property owner, they couldn't give me information on why.) The roommates had smoked in the house. The renter had also brought in two untrained black labs who chewed up baseboards, dug holes in the backyard (half the grass was completely gone), peed all over the carpets, etc.

Our renter basically dared us to try to evict him. We started the legal proceedings.

I deal with anxiety, and this has flared it up BIG TIME. I have countless text messages that were threatening and even abusive. Matt and I prayed the whole time that his heart would be softened. We felt like our prayers were answered. He decided to move out and was humble when we went over to inspect the house and get the keys. He even apologized for the text messages and tried his best to clean the house before he left.

He was out on a Sunday night. By Monday morning we had hired a handyman (our neighbor, Bob), and a cleaner (my cousin, Alana). They started working on the place. My Sargent Steamer earned its keep -- I don't know what I would've done without it. On Monday we had bids for painting, carpeting and landscaping. By Saturday afternoon -- only six days later, we had the place completely re-done. We figured this guy has cost us over $8000 between the cost to fix up the house, legal fees, and lost rent.

It was funny because we actually enjoyed this process of playing general contractor and fixing the house up. Matt and I spent hours this past week at the rental -- Matt worked on the sprinklers and some of the yard stuff. I finished up the cleaning. As we walked away from the home on Saturday night, completely exhausted, we were proud of all we had done. We feel blessed that we found good people to help us and that the timing worked out so well.

Now we can find new renters! If anyone is looking for a home in Sandy...

(4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, $1350 per month)